I'll get in trouble for this since SpyC wanted to blog it, however, it's been over two months and she hasn't yet, so I claim the stake now.
When we were packing our crap in preparation for the move, we went through our closet. We were looking for about a week's worth of clothing to keep with us, unload the clothes we didn't like/didn't want/couldn't fit in, etc. and pack the rest. When going through my pants, I came across a pair of black khakis that I purchased last minute in Palm Springs a couple of years ago. As I pulled the pants from the hanger, I suddenly realized which pair of pants these were. Beth said to get rid of them, and I immediately said, "No! They have fat tabs!" She looked at me quizically, wondering, "What in the hell are fat tabs?" then started busting up laughing. I explained to her the pants had little elastic tabs in both sides of the pant to allow for, um, growth. Convenient for weight gain or a serious Las Vegas buffet. She nearly rolled on the floor with laughter.
I tried the pants on and to my shagrin, they were floods. Perfect if you lived in New Orleans, but they weren't going to cut it anywhere else. I had to accept my pants with fat tabs, which I had probably worn just once - the day I bought them - were too short and would have to go to Goodwill. The pants were ultra comfy, but alas they served their purpose, which was to provide me with clothing to see "The Follies" in Palm Springs. Beth and I had flown there together for what was supposed to be a one-day visit with my parents and aunt and uncle. That night they had tickets to "The Follies" and wanted us to stay. After much pressure, we relented, but had no acceptable clothes to wear to the event. So off to the mall we went. I bought my fat tabs along with a polo shirt and black sandals.
We had a great time and I thought nothing of the fat tabs when I bought the pants. It's sad how I never came to appreciate them until I discovered they were too short to keep. Who knew a few years later they would bring such a chuckle. My only wish is that there is someone out there wearing my precious pants with fat tabs and enjoying them as much as I should have.